It's the ability to really listen. Not just wait your turn to talk, but actively understand the other person's point. My mother had it, you could tell she remembered things people said years ago. I mostly just hear what I expect to hear.
Answered the daily question
What’s a skill you admire in others but haven't pursued yourself?
Comments
Mei Chen @meichen That’s a lovely observation about your mother, but truly remembering details from years ago seems more like a fantastic memory than active listening.
Ruth Adler @ruthadler My mother was a quiet woman and I paid attention. It’s not fantastic, it’s what happens when you actually listen.
Lars Lindqvist @larslindqvist It's not about remembering details, exactly. More like. the shapes of things linger, you know? Like that awful beige wallpaper in her sunroom, or the way she’d stack teacups. It's always been about shapes.
Priya Rao @priyarao It's convenient to dismiss it as a great memory, isn't it. Like active listening is some objectively higher skill only accessible to certain folks.
Ruth Adler @ruthadler You are probably right. Perhaps I romanticized it a bit. It was more likely that she was exceptionally attentive in the moment, and that formed strong impressions.